I'm sorry if this offends but I can't stop laughing when I look at it.
That poor cat!!! It's gotta suck to look like the most evil person who ever lived.
December 11, 2008
December 10, 2008
Why Tina Fey is my hero
Another long one... Don’t read this if you are a pod person.
In the 80s I was in high school and it remains my favorite decade. Times were good: The US had finally pulled out of the recessive economy of the 70s and seemed to have once and for all said sayonara to oversized collars, mustard-cum-avocado kitchens and no-country-for-old-men hair. People were happy. Of course, it’s pretty hard to feel down when everyone's wearing bright, baggy clothes, enormous shoulder pads, ankle boots and outrageously upswept hair while listening to Duran Duran. It can be done but you have to really want it.
Anyway, from my perspective the overall tone of the US was positive in the 80s. Life was good and we were the good guys, at least to some people. The only somber note that impinged on my myopic teen awareness was Woody Allen, who stopped making quirky Diane Keaton movies in order to tackle more boring and serious subject matter with Mia Farrow.
The 90s got a bit more serious, fashion got edgier, music offered a more biting undertone and the overall mood in the US seemed to become more conservative and severe. Nonetheless, it was a pretty good decade and even Woody perked up a bit and made a musical although he still had his dark moments. But although times were still good, the stage was being set for future difficulties on the economic, political and environmental fronts.
And sure enough, in the new millennium the US saw the some real setbacks. We saw the American presidential electoral system stumble with a suspect vote count in Florida – and who was governor there again? Following this we saw the judicial branch of our government deliver a questionable ruling about this, and may I point out as a former student of political science that quasi-currupt judicial rulings are never a good sign. We saw hideous terrorist attacks on US territory. We saw the US sell the farm to go to war - against the advice of the international community - on the basis of scanty evidence around who we should be attacking, which later turned out to be false. We saw the US withdraw from the Kyoto Protocol that was signed in 1997 – in fact, we saw the US pull away from the international community on every topic from environment to human rights and erode its good standing as both a global citizen and leader. We saw the systematic erosion of laws that are in place to protect American civil liberties. We saw young soldiers begin to come home and overwhelm the available care facilities.
Other political highlights included dying forests and habitats, gloom and doom predictions from increasingly respected scientific sources, a lagging school system, a growing pettiness and intolerance of personal choice, an imploding health care system, freedom fries, an explosion of national debt (I mean, some increase of national debt is normal when a Republican takes office but this was well beyond the norm), and a meltdown of the greedy financial sector that isn’t over yet.
Wow. Tough decade. On the bright side, Woody Allen teamed up with Scarlett Johansson and started making comedies again.
Which brings me to my next point: the importance of humor in difficult times. All of these things were terrible (and too many of them still are) but for me what really stood out during this decade was when late night comedians stopped making fun of the White House. Needless to say, late night comedy wasn't nearly as funny without the political jokes, since politics were the funniest thing going on during those tense months. But what really wasn’t funny was the erosion of freedom of speech in the US for several years, which manifested in entertainment, business interactions and even personal relationships. It was a time of not saying what you thought because you didn’t know how the other person would react to politically sensitive topics.
So instead of demanding solutions - which would have required speaking out and might have come across as unpatriotic in this humorless political climate - people sought refuge in consumption, buying SUVs, bottled water, imported toys and gadgets, hedge funds and Support Our Troops stickers. Ironic, isn’t it?
Can we blame this on the President? Oh, I’d like to. He certainly played a role in setting the national tone and was a staunch friend to big oil and the folks who want to cut down our forests. But mostly we did it to ourselves. Mind you, it could have been much, much worse but for a while there it wasn’t the US I thought I grew up in because the Americans seemed like different people.
Tina Fey’s hilarious portrayal of Sarah Palin was comedic gold but for me it was more than that. It was as if Tina Fey ushered in a new era that made it OK to laugh again about real topics. She wasn’t the first to bring comedy back to politics (we should also acknowledge the contributions of John Stewart and others to this important work) but she's the one that stands out for me as a tipping point. And what a difference it makes when it's OK to laugh again! I don’t think we’ll be in a position to recapture the happy mood of the 80s for some time but people do seem more at ease with each other, less defensive, more open, than they did a few years ago. And most importantly, more willing to talk about what’s wrong and how to fix it, not just sweep it under the carpet with disapproving, humorless silence. We’ll need this to work together on the tasks ahead.
Don’t get me wrong, laughing is no substitute for taking action. But it helps create an environment of tolerance where taking action can be seen as patriotic rather than unpatriotic.
So, thank you, Tina Fey, for putting the 'mock' back in Democracy!
Oh, and speaking of political action, I nearly choked laughing when I watched the 30 Rock where Tina Fey dresses up as Princess Leia to get out of jury duty.
I wonder if Carrie Fischer could get away with that. . .
Enjoy!
In the 80s I was in high school and it remains my favorite decade. Times were good: The US had finally pulled out of the recessive economy of the 70s and seemed to have once and for all said sayonara to oversized collars, mustard-cum-avocado kitchens and no-country-for-old-men hair. People were happy. Of course, it’s pretty hard to feel down when everyone's wearing bright, baggy clothes, enormous shoulder pads, ankle boots and outrageously upswept hair while listening to Duran Duran. It can be done but you have to really want it.
Anyway, from my perspective the overall tone of the US was positive in the 80s. Life was good and we were the good guys, at least to some people. The only somber note that impinged on my myopic teen awareness was Woody Allen, who stopped making quirky Diane Keaton movies in order to tackle more boring and serious subject matter with Mia Farrow.
The 90s got a bit more serious, fashion got edgier, music offered a more biting undertone and the overall mood in the US seemed to become more conservative and severe. Nonetheless, it was a pretty good decade and even Woody perked up a bit and made a musical although he still had his dark moments. But although times were still good, the stage was being set for future difficulties on the economic, political and environmental fronts.
And sure enough, in the new millennium the US saw the some real setbacks. We saw the American presidential electoral system stumble with a suspect vote count in Florida – and who was governor there again? Following this we saw the judicial branch of our government deliver a questionable ruling about this, and may I point out as a former student of political science that quasi-currupt judicial rulings are never a good sign. We saw hideous terrorist attacks on US territory. We saw the US sell the farm to go to war - against the advice of the international community - on the basis of scanty evidence around who we should be attacking, which later turned out to be false. We saw the US withdraw from the Kyoto Protocol that was signed in 1997 – in fact, we saw the US pull away from the international community on every topic from environment to human rights and erode its good standing as both a global citizen and leader. We saw the systematic erosion of laws that are in place to protect American civil liberties. We saw young soldiers begin to come home and overwhelm the available care facilities.
Other political highlights included dying forests and habitats, gloom and doom predictions from increasingly respected scientific sources, a lagging school system, a growing pettiness and intolerance of personal choice, an imploding health care system, freedom fries, an explosion of national debt (I mean, some increase of national debt is normal when a Republican takes office but this was well beyond the norm), and a meltdown of the greedy financial sector that isn’t over yet.
Wow. Tough decade. On the bright side, Woody Allen teamed up with Scarlett Johansson and started making comedies again.
Which brings me to my next point: the importance of humor in difficult times. All of these things were terrible (and too many of them still are) but for me what really stood out during this decade was when late night comedians stopped making fun of the White House. Needless to say, late night comedy wasn't nearly as funny without the political jokes, since politics were the funniest thing going on during those tense months. But what really wasn’t funny was the erosion of freedom of speech in the US for several years, which manifested in entertainment, business interactions and even personal relationships. It was a time of not saying what you thought because you didn’t know how the other person would react to politically sensitive topics.
So instead of demanding solutions - which would have required speaking out and might have come across as unpatriotic in this humorless political climate - people sought refuge in consumption, buying SUVs, bottled water, imported toys and gadgets, hedge funds and Support Our Troops stickers. Ironic, isn’t it?
Can we blame this on the President? Oh, I’d like to. He certainly played a role in setting the national tone and was a staunch friend to big oil and the folks who want to cut down our forests. But mostly we did it to ourselves. Mind you, it could have been much, much worse but for a while there it wasn’t the US I thought I grew up in because the Americans seemed like different people.
Tina Fey’s hilarious portrayal of Sarah Palin was comedic gold but for me it was more than that. It was as if Tina Fey ushered in a new era that made it OK to laugh again about real topics. She wasn’t the first to bring comedy back to politics (we should also acknowledge the contributions of John Stewart and others to this important work) but she's the one that stands out for me as a tipping point. And what a difference it makes when it's OK to laugh again! I don’t think we’ll be in a position to recapture the happy mood of the 80s for some time but people do seem more at ease with each other, less defensive, more open, than they did a few years ago. And most importantly, more willing to talk about what’s wrong and how to fix it, not just sweep it under the carpet with disapproving, humorless silence. We’ll need this to work together on the tasks ahead.
Don’t get me wrong, laughing is no substitute for taking action. But it helps create an environment of tolerance where taking action can be seen as patriotic rather than unpatriotic.
So, thank you, Tina Fey, for putting the 'mock' back in Democracy!
Oh, and speaking of political action, I nearly choked laughing when I watched the 30 Rock where Tina Fey dresses up as Princess Leia to get out of jury duty.
I wonder if Carrie Fischer could get away with that. . .
Enjoy!
December 9, 2008
Conversations with boobies
Yes, I refer to my kids as my boobies. It’s actually ‘bubis’, which is short for ‘bubalah’ (a lovely Hebrew word for Sweetheart), but the Germans use the term ‘bubis’ to describe boys. So I get some pretty strange looks from Germans and Americans alike when I say, ‘Come on, bubis. ’Maybe I should take a page out of Scarlett Johansson's book and refer to them as 'my leading ladies.'
Anyway, just a short post today to share two conversations I had with my bubis yesterday.
K: Mommy, how old are you?
Me: I’m xx.
K: Were you ever 30?
Me: Sure, xx years ago.
K: Whoa. That’s a lot.
Author's comment: Note the use of the word 'whoa', which I found more dramatically expressive than 'wow' would have been.
Me (to L): Come here, you succulent thing, you!
L: No, Mommy, you’re a sucky thing.
December 8, 2008
Something real
After I ignored his half-serious Blogverbot yesterday, Ralf has weighed in that I should write about something real. And I ask you. Is our child's stuggle to sleep nights without a pacifier not real? Is our insidious dependence on machines and increasing reliance on virtual experience not real?
Although, virtual reality isn't real by definition so maybe that's a bad example.
But anyway, what Ralf would like to see is something to do with the spirit of the Christmas season, such as how we can reach out to those who need help.
About me. In a work situation, where I know my subject, I am confident but drop me down in the middle of a party where people are making small talk and I go hide at the buffet. My charitable actions tend to be anonymous. I sponsor two children, Laura in Bolivia with the Christian Children's Fund and a child whose privacy is protected in Germany through the SOS Kinderdorf. I give the Contra Costa Food Bank $100 at Thanksgiving and Christmas. I make periodic donations to Doctors without Borders and Unicef. But I never actually talk to anyone or engage with them. I don't volunteer at soup kitchens. I don't reach out.
Ralf is different. He likes people. He thinks they are basically good. He is unbiased by appearances. In many ways he is a truly civilized man. And while he is not in the habit of picking strays, and is perfectly capable of walking past someone begging on the street, he is the one who stays behind to exhange a few pleasantries when I drop my change in someone's cup and run off. So maybe between the two of us we add up to one good person. ;-)
One night in Walnut Creek when he was taking the bus home instead of driving in order to avoid putting putting carbon in the atmosphere, he noticed a woman on the bus with a lot of bags. She looked clean but tired and a bit worn and threadbare. When she got off the bus he chatted with the bus driver and discovered that she is homeless. The bus driver is a kind soul that helps her as she can, stores stuff for her, receives her mail, etc. Anyway, this person has been homeless for several years since a physical condition combined with downsizing resulted in her losing her job. Apparently she has no family she can rely on and most of her friends also evaporated when her luck took a downturn.
She is active, however. She is skilled in computers and she volunteers at several organizations, teaching, doing computer work, etc. For this she gets a bit of food and sometimes clothes or something of that kind. She struggles to get enough money to buy food and medication and sleeps outside most nights but somehow manages to stay clean and play an active role in society. The truly ironic thing (besides being unable to find more assistance in a wealthy community like Walnut Creek) is that because she is not a drug addict or a battered wife she is not eligible for most forms of active aid in the East Bay.
It is very different in Germany, where an educated white collar worker can get up to two years of government support as well as re-education in order to help them bridge difficult times and keep them off the street. People take advantge of this, naturally, but in the end this extravagant social net allows them time to get their act together and avoid losing everything, which in the long run is better for the economy.
Anyway, the next day when Ralf saw her on the bus he engaged her in conversation and gave her some money to buy dinner. And since then he has corresponded with her by email and we send her various gift cards on a semi-regular basis - practical ones like Safeway so she can buy food and medicine, and frivolous ones like Starbucks. Each time she thanks us with a loving, effusive email and tells us what a difference it makes to have someone in her life that cares.
Lately something good has happened - the husband of an old friend of hers reached out and asked her to help at Fresh Start, which is a day support center for people in need located in Walnut Creek. I particularly like that they advocate homeless children with the local school boards in order to help them stay in school. As well as offering those daily essentials most of us take for granted, food, a warm place to sit, washer and dryer, bathing facilities, online access and paper.
Fresh Start offers something for all types of charitible impulses - you can donate anonymously or jump in and volunteer. Or you can do something comletely different. Whatever suits your style, 'tis the season to do something that gives someone in need something to be thankful for.
There's nothing more real than that.
Although, virtual reality isn't real by definition so maybe that's a bad example.
But anyway, what Ralf would like to see is something to do with the spirit of the Christmas season, such as how we can reach out to those who need help.
About me. In a work situation, where I know my subject, I am confident but drop me down in the middle of a party where people are making small talk and I go hide at the buffet. My charitable actions tend to be anonymous. I sponsor two children, Laura in Bolivia with the Christian Children's Fund and a child whose privacy is protected in Germany through the SOS Kinderdorf. I give the Contra Costa Food Bank $100 at Thanksgiving and Christmas. I make periodic donations to Doctors without Borders and Unicef. But I never actually talk to anyone or engage with them. I don't volunteer at soup kitchens. I don't reach out.
Ralf is different. He likes people. He thinks they are basically good. He is unbiased by appearances. In many ways he is a truly civilized man. And while he is not in the habit of picking strays, and is perfectly capable of walking past someone begging on the street, he is the one who stays behind to exhange a few pleasantries when I drop my change in someone's cup and run off. So maybe between the two of us we add up to one good person. ;-)
One night in Walnut Creek when he was taking the bus home instead of driving in order to avoid putting putting carbon in the atmosphere, he noticed a woman on the bus with a lot of bags. She looked clean but tired and a bit worn and threadbare. When she got off the bus he chatted with the bus driver and discovered that she is homeless. The bus driver is a kind soul that helps her as she can, stores stuff for her, receives her mail, etc. Anyway, this person has been homeless for several years since a physical condition combined with downsizing resulted in her losing her job. Apparently she has no family she can rely on and most of her friends also evaporated when her luck took a downturn.
She is active, however. She is skilled in computers and she volunteers at several organizations, teaching, doing computer work, etc. For this she gets a bit of food and sometimes clothes or something of that kind. She struggles to get enough money to buy food and medication and sleeps outside most nights but somehow manages to stay clean and play an active role in society. The truly ironic thing (besides being unable to find more assistance in a wealthy community like Walnut Creek) is that because she is not a drug addict or a battered wife she is not eligible for most forms of active aid in the East Bay.
It is very different in Germany, where an educated white collar worker can get up to two years of government support as well as re-education in order to help them bridge difficult times and keep them off the street. People take advantge of this, naturally, but in the end this extravagant social net allows them time to get their act together and avoid losing everything, which in the long run is better for the economy.
Anyway, the next day when Ralf saw her on the bus he engaged her in conversation and gave her some money to buy dinner. And since then he has corresponded with her by email and we send her various gift cards on a semi-regular basis - practical ones like Safeway so she can buy food and medicine, and frivolous ones like Starbucks. Each time she thanks us with a loving, effusive email and tells us what a difference it makes to have someone in her life that cares.
Lately something good has happened - the husband of an old friend of hers reached out and asked her to help at Fresh Start, which is a day support center for people in need located in Walnut Creek. I particularly like that they advocate homeless children with the local school boards in order to help them stay in school. As well as offering those daily essentials most of us take for granted, food, a warm place to sit, washer and dryer, bathing facilities, online access and paper.
Fresh Start offers something for all types of charitible impulses - you can donate anonymously or jump in and volunteer. Or you can do something comletely different. Whatever suits your style, 'tis the season to do something that gives someone in need something to be thankful for.
There's nothing more real than that.
December 7, 2008
Wii are not amused
I just explained to Ralf that if you want to be anyone in Blogland you have to do NaBloPoMo, which is an online forum where people sign up to blog every day for one month. He stared at me for a minute as if he couldn't remember who I was and said that if you don't have anything to say you shouldn't blog about it. He probably has a point but since I'm a new blogger I acutally use NaBloPoMo to keep my postings down to one a day as a courtesy to people who read what I write so this doesn't really apply to me. He then forbade me to blog any more.
Anyway, now that he's out of the way I can get back to work on today's blog.
On my recent flight back to California I watched Wall-e, which I expected to annoy me but was actually quite well done. I mean, I won't rush out to watch it again but it was a perfectly good in flight movie. What really caught my attention, however, was the plausible portrayal of human beings in the distant future: obese, immobile, lost in virtual reality and drifting in space after having pretty much destroyed the Earth. Ick. Even babies were packed into floating chairs that restrained their movement and hooked up to the big VR machine. It made my skin crawl, all the more because it's not that out there. Not nearly out there enough.
We are in the process of making a transformation from the information age to the information brain. I'm sure some professor out there has a better term to describe it but that's my term and if you want to see something really cool check out The Machine is Us(ing Us) on YouTube. This video shows us the beauty of the information age but there's a darker side. For example, I have to wonder what the xbox ad team is thinking when they show a smiling child from the front with a scooped out brain replaced by X Box in the back.
By the way, I see the irony of sitting in front of my computer blogging about the evils of the information age to a virtual audience.
A recent article in The Huffington Post 'Man versus Machine' examines the role computers played in the current financial crisis. It's kind of long and pedantic but has some good quotes from smart people about what it all means. And although the fault seems to lie primarily with stupid, greedy people who either failed to understand the risks or chose to ignore them because they were making money, the implication of relying on computer programs that have a billion times more processing power than you is something society may want to put more thought into.
I don't have the answers but before you run out and buy that wii for your kids I'd like to leave you with this final video that makes fun of wii and its role in modern society. It's not quite as hard-hitting as I would like it to be but the idea gets across.
Anyway, now that he's out of the way I can get back to work on today's blog.
On my recent flight back to California I watched Wall-e, which I expected to annoy me but was actually quite well done. I mean, I won't rush out to watch it again but it was a perfectly good in flight movie. What really caught my attention, however, was the plausible portrayal of human beings in the distant future: obese, immobile, lost in virtual reality and drifting in space after having pretty much destroyed the Earth. Ick. Even babies were packed into floating chairs that restrained their movement and hooked up to the big VR machine. It made my skin crawl, all the more because it's not that out there. Not nearly out there enough.
We are in the process of making a transformation from the information age to the information brain. I'm sure some professor out there has a better term to describe it but that's my term and if you want to see something really cool check out The Machine is Us(ing Us) on YouTube. This video shows us the beauty of the information age but there's a darker side. For example, I have to wonder what the xbox ad team is thinking when they show a smiling child from the front with a scooped out brain replaced by X Box in the back.
By the way, I see the irony of sitting in front of my computer blogging about the evils of the information age to a virtual audience.
A recent article in The Huffington Post 'Man versus Machine' examines the role computers played in the current financial crisis. It's kind of long and pedantic but has some good quotes from smart people about what it all means. And although the fault seems to lie primarily with stupid, greedy people who either failed to understand the risks or chose to ignore them because they were making money, the implication of relying on computer programs that have a billion times more processing power than you is something society may want to put more thought into.
I don't have the answers but before you run out and buy that wii for your kids I'd like to leave you with this final video that makes fun of wii and its role in modern society. It's not quite as hard-hitting as I would like it to be but the idea gets across.
December 6, 2008
The Deed is done
L's Schnully is no more. Yesterday evening at around 7:30 Berndt came by in a felty Nikolaus costume to pass out presents and collect L's Schnullies (pacifiers). K, ever practical, had no issue with the glaring fakeness of Santa - she answered all questions promptly and courteously in order to get her present, then ran off to open it without saying thank you. L, who had taken one last snuffly, sweaty nap with her beloved Schnully after Kindergarten then bravely put all them in a Baby Gap bag for Nikolaus, buried her head in my shoulder and indicated in a sad, choked up little voice that I should complete the transaction. I was feeling pretty choked up myself. K had accepted at face value that 3-year-olds give their pacis to Nikolaus in exchange for a present but L doesn't quite see why a man who brings toys to all the children in the world can't get his own Schnullies.
Anyway, thus we traded away another child's beloved and dependable comfort object in exchange for (we hope) good teeth and better coping skills. I'm fairly certain she'll be sending us the therapist's bill for this one in twenty years.
Why do I think so? Well, for one thing Nikolaus gave L a baby-sized Snow White doll, which she took to at once, making her up a soft little bed and whispering reassuringly that she wouldn't let anyone steal her baby's Schnully. I had to take that one on the chin.
As a special treat L got to sleep in our bed that night. I'm afraid Ralf got the short end of that stick, however, because L snozzled up against him all night, took over his pillow, made loud succulent noises right near his ear and did her best to push him out of bed. On the bright side, I slept great and except for one small accident and a short outbreak of weeping in the middle of the night, L also slept through.
That makes today the first day of L's Schnully-free life. And tonight she is spending the night at her grandparents', where we hope there won't be so many bittersweet associations.
December 5, 2008
I am better than your kids
Year ago this video made the rounds as a Word document and it was funny then. As a video it's even funnier, especially with the Elmo soundtrack. Best of all it's suitable for small children, as long as they can't read. My kids love it!
December 4, 2008
Christmas Fondue Sauces
After my recent Christmas posting, I received a couple of requests for meat fondue sauces so here there are. They are a well-guarded family secret that Ralf's dad's been accumulating and perfecting over years so use them well. And make sure you have bread to mop up the meat juice and mixed sauces at the end!
Curry Sauce
1 cup sour cream
1 tsp. honey
1 tsp. curry
1 tbl. lemon juice
Salt, Pepper, a shot of Whisky
Mustard Sauce
1 cup sour cream
1 tbl. med. sharp mustard
1/2 tsp. sugar
2 tbl. chopped fresh dill (or 1 tsp dry Dill)
1 tbs. lemon juice
Salt, Pepper
Cream Cheese Sauce
½ package cream cheese
3 tbs. sour cream
1 tbs. finely chopped onion
1 tbs. minced sour pickle
1 tbs. finely chopped parsley
Salt, Pepper, lemon juice
Herb Sauce
1 cup sour cream
1 tbs. finely chopped onion
1 tbs. Mayonnaise
1 hard boiled egg, minced
Finely chopped chives, parsley, dill
Salt, Pepper, a dash of mustard, vinegar und sugar
Horseradish Sauce
½ cup whipping cream
1 peeled and grated Granny Smith apple
3 tsp. horseradish
Salt and a pinch of sugar
Spicy Sauce
3 tbs. sour cream
1 tbs. Mayonnaise
Hot Ketchup
Salt, pinch sugar, Cayenne pepper or Tobasco
Shot of Cognac
Pink Sauce
4 tbs. unsweetened whipped cream
2 tbs. Mayonnaise
1 tbs. minced capers
1 minced hardboiled egg
1 tbs. Hot Ketchup
Salt, Pepper, lemon juice
Curry Sauce
1 cup sour cream
1 tsp. honey
1 tsp. curry
1 tbl. lemon juice
Salt, Pepper, a shot of Whisky
Mustard Sauce
1 cup sour cream
1 tbl. med. sharp mustard
1/2 tsp. sugar
2 tbl. chopped fresh dill (or 1 tsp dry Dill)
1 tbs. lemon juice
Salt, Pepper
Cream Cheese Sauce
½ package cream cheese
3 tbs. sour cream
1 tbs. finely chopped onion
1 tbs. minced sour pickle
1 tbs. finely chopped parsley
Salt, Pepper, lemon juice
Herb Sauce
1 cup sour cream
1 tbs. finely chopped onion
1 tbs. Mayonnaise
1 hard boiled egg, minced
Finely chopped chives, parsley, dill
Salt, Pepper, a dash of mustard, vinegar und sugar
Horseradish Sauce
½ cup whipping cream
1 peeled and grated Granny Smith apple
3 tsp. horseradish
Salt and a pinch of sugar
Spicy Sauce
3 tbs. sour cream
1 tbs. Mayonnaise
Hot Ketchup
Salt, pinch sugar, Cayenne pepper or Tobasco
Shot of Cognac
Pink Sauce
4 tbs. unsweetened whipped cream
2 tbs. Mayonnaise
1 tbs. minced capers
1 minced hardboiled egg
1 tbs. Hot Ketchup
Salt, Pepper, lemon juice
December 3, 2008
Sorry, Virginia, there is no Santa Claus
Ralf outed Santa the other day in front of our neighbors' kids. Well, sort of. He actually outed Nikolaus, who is a big guy in a red suit that brings presents on Dec 6th. To help Americans distinguish between Nikolaus and Santa, Nikolaus puts the presents in shoes instead of stockings and comes on the wrong day.
A popular ruse in Germany to get kids off their pacifiers is for kids to give them to Nikolaus in exchange for a present. I embellished the tale by saying he needs them as payment for the elves who make all the toys. This worked great for K, although we have our concerns about L, who is less materialistic than K. This makes it hard to know what sort of gift would make the trade worth it to her and we're expecting a bad week after the hand off.
But to do the hand off in the first place, you need a plausible Nikolaus. We used our colleague Albrecht for K but he's 6'5" with a distinctive voice and now that K's 5 and extremely observant we didn't think it would work. Ralf and his dad are also out, for similar reasons. Annette, alas, is divorced so no hubby to impose upon. So we hit upon our other neighbors, Berndt and Elizabeth, who live across from us and have two daughters that are a bit old to play with our girls. As it happens, they owe us, because Ralf played Nikolaus for them about 4 years ago when their kids were about the age our kids are now.
So, the other evening I sent Ralf over to ask and as these things go, the whole family came to the door in search of action. Ralf made his request, not really thinking that their youngest (who is about 8) could possibly still believe in Santa, sorry I mean Nikolaus, when he noticed Elizabeth making frantic throat-slitting gestures at him. Then Julia, the youngest, piped up with, 'Nikolaus comes on Friday anyway, why don't you just ask him to do it?'
It might have still been all right except for the little matter of the costume. Berndt, who was looking at Ralf, missed Elizabeth's 'abort! abort!' hand signals and asked if he should wear his own costume.
In the end the whole thing was glossed over with those lame parental excuses we all remember from our own childhood, the kind you accept at the time but file away to examine later on the therapist's couch. Ralf slunk home feeling sheepish, as befits someone who blows the whistle on Christmas magic.
Personally, I don't care that much if my kids believe in Santa once the pacifiers are gone. I mean, it's a nice fantasy that I'll keep alive as long as I can but I don't want to attach now that we have two informed older girls living right next door.
A popular ruse in Germany to get kids off their pacifiers is for kids to give them to Nikolaus in exchange for a present. I embellished the tale by saying he needs them as payment for the elves who make all the toys. This worked great for K, although we have our concerns about L, who is less materialistic than K. This makes it hard to know what sort of gift would make the trade worth it to her and we're expecting a bad week after the hand off.
But to do the hand off in the first place, you need a plausible Nikolaus. We used our colleague Albrecht for K but he's 6'5" with a distinctive voice and now that K's 5 and extremely observant we didn't think it would work. Ralf and his dad are also out, for similar reasons. Annette, alas, is divorced so no hubby to impose upon. So we hit upon our other neighbors, Berndt and Elizabeth, who live across from us and have two daughters that are a bit old to play with our girls. As it happens, they owe us, because Ralf played Nikolaus for them about 4 years ago when their kids were about the age our kids are now.
So, the other evening I sent Ralf over to ask and as these things go, the whole family came to the door in search of action. Ralf made his request, not really thinking that their youngest (who is about 8) could possibly still believe in Santa, sorry I mean Nikolaus, when he noticed Elizabeth making frantic throat-slitting gestures at him. Then Julia, the youngest, piped up with, 'Nikolaus comes on Friday anyway, why don't you just ask him to do it?'
It might have still been all right except for the little matter of the costume. Berndt, who was looking at Ralf, missed Elizabeth's 'abort! abort!' hand signals and asked if he should wear his own costume.
In the end the whole thing was glossed over with those lame parental excuses we all remember from our own childhood, the kind you accept at the time but file away to examine later on the therapist's couch. Ralf slunk home feeling sheepish, as befits someone who blows the whistle on Christmas magic.
Personally, I don't care that much if my kids believe in Santa once the pacifiers are gone. I mean, it's a nice fantasy that I'll keep alive as long as I can but I don't want to attach now that we have two informed older girls living right next door.
December 2, 2008
Meditations About Meditation
Sometime during our California sojourn Ralf and I joined a Sangha, which is a group of people who get together to meditate. Well, actually Ralf joined and I came along to have dinner out with my husband afterwards. I was not looking for enlightenment or happiness or inner peace, as I felt that I already had more or less enough of these things to be going on with. The Sangha leader was younger and more humorous than I had expected and immediately caught my attention by pointing out that most of us don’t have the luxury of pursuing enlightenment in a beautiful Zen retreat. With that statement he differentiated himself from traditional spiritual leaders who seem a bit out of touch with daily modern life. His take on enlightenment (and I’m way oversimplifying here) is the practice of giving yourself some distance from your ‘problems’ by watching yourself react to them. Metaphysically speaking, you take a step back and try to see things more clearly and less emotionally. You do this by sitting still, shutting up and watching your thoughts. Or, as he put it, ‘facing your life.’ This approach is equally applicable in a Zen retreat or a hectic professional life.
I don’t pretend to be a good or even consistent sitter but I am a believer. From the outset I found that my busy mind welcomed a bit of calm and after a few minutes of relative mental stillness it would start to feel as if my brain was tingling. I’m thinking that the brain is so used to being constantly active, hyperactively throwing out scenarios in order to be prepared for any eventuality, that it starts following the same old pathways by rote. We might call that being smart or analytical or professional or paranoid but what it amounts to is that you’re so good at a certain type of thinking after years of practice that you don’t have to put much effort into it any more. A natural outcome of all this repetitive activity is that the brain doesn’t need to develop in new areas because it’s already good at what has made you successful and you’re busy so why bother? Anyway, my interpretation of that tingling sensation is that the brain seizes the opportunity to stretch out a bit as soon as those stagnant old thoughts stop hogging the stage.
OK, I’m probably wrong about this but tingly brain feels pretty neat.
There are undeniable and well-documented health benefits to stilling your thoughts. Just as sweating in a sauna can remove toxins from your body, regularly sitting to calm those restless, circular thoughts can help quiet the poisonous thoughts that harm you. And this process is what over time allows you to create space or distance around your problems so they don’t loom quite so large. And more importantly, your response to them becomes more appropriate, which in turn makes them smaller. We've all experienced how an overemotional response to a problem tends to make it worse. Luckily, the reverse is also true.
My personal example of the ‘space around your problems’ thing happened one evening early on when I arrived at Sangha absolutely furious over something at work. I was vastly pissed off and I didn’t expect to be able to sit still at all, let alone quiet my thoughts. Oddly enough, that was one of my best sittings. I suddenly had this incredible sensation of splitting into two awarenesses, one childish and furious and the other calm, loving and wise. The angry one was clearly me but I was able to recognize myself in the wise one as well, which felt kind of like me when I’m at my best as a mom. As this wise motherly presence I was able to watch my own tantrum with love and patience just as if I were one of my own kids and see how trivial the problem was in the grand scheme of things. It was kind of like when a friend describes some situation that is causing them pain and you are able to see clearly that it’s not that bad because you’re not the one caught up in it. There was space around the problem that allowed me to observe my reaction to it impartially.
This personality split is what is referred to as 'beginner's luck,' where you have a cool spiritual experience early on in your practice and then nothing for the next ten years. It has not happened since and I’m happy to report that although myriad things have annoyed me in the meantime, there hasn’t been anything else bad enough to trigger schizophrenia. But the experience created a lasting impression and a belief that we are more than our little concerns and subjective experiences and that we’d all be happier if we’d treat ourselves with the same love and tolerance we give our kids (on a good day, that is).
I admit that I am not very far along the Buddhist path and I certainly wouldn’t call myself a Buddhist. The interconnectedness of everything doesn’t impress me much as a reason to, say, love thy neighbor (that is, I believe that we’re all interconnected but I still think some people totally suck), and I also believe in good and evil, despite my Sangha leader’s best efforts to change my mind. But the practice of meditation offers some cool takeaways even for us spiritual Philistines.
For example, one of my go to practices while sitting is something that both Anthony Robbins and Eckhart Tolle recommend: I concentrate on the force of life in my hands. That probably sounds corny if you haven’t tried it but think about it: something flows through the universe on a such a microscopic level we can only theorize about it after years of graduate school, connecting everything, holding it all together somehow. This is now accepted in both the spiritual sphere (well, at least by the Buddhists) and the scientific sphere. And the amazing thing is that if you focus your undivided attention on your hands you can actually start to feel that something, or at least a darn good imitation. For some reason it’s stronger in the hands than other parts of the body and stronger still if you bring your hands near each other without touching. It’s not your soul, it’s certainly not your thoughts but it might just be the source of life itself. And the really cool thing is that if I pet my cat after doing this he gets a light static shock so he tends to stay away from me when I'm sitting.
I sometimes wonder what kind of world this would be if we taught our children to pay attention to the life within them instead of how to follow schedules, take tests and manipulate people to get what they want?
Anyway, believe me or don’t, but give it a try. Tingly hands are almost as cool as tingly brain and quite refreshing after hours of compensation design.
And my very favorite thing about sitting? You’ll never guess. It’s the laughter. Sometimes when I’m watching my own thoughts I hear the most fantastic, joyful laughter in my head. It kind of sounds like me but more so. It doesn’t happen often and it’s probably just my own imagined reaction to some silly egoic thoughts I’m having but whoever it is laughing in there sounds like someone I want to know better.
So at the end of the day I keep sitting, hoping it’s me.
I don’t pretend to be a good or even consistent sitter but I am a believer. From the outset I found that my busy mind welcomed a bit of calm and after a few minutes of relative mental stillness it would start to feel as if my brain was tingling. I’m thinking that the brain is so used to being constantly active, hyperactively throwing out scenarios in order to be prepared for any eventuality, that it starts following the same old pathways by rote. We might call that being smart or analytical or professional or paranoid but what it amounts to is that you’re so good at a certain type of thinking after years of practice that you don’t have to put much effort into it any more. A natural outcome of all this repetitive activity is that the brain doesn’t need to develop in new areas because it’s already good at what has made you successful and you’re busy so why bother? Anyway, my interpretation of that tingling sensation is that the brain seizes the opportunity to stretch out a bit as soon as those stagnant old thoughts stop hogging the stage.
OK, I’m probably wrong about this but tingly brain feels pretty neat.
There are undeniable and well-documented health benefits to stilling your thoughts. Just as sweating in a sauna can remove toxins from your body, regularly sitting to calm those restless, circular thoughts can help quiet the poisonous thoughts that harm you. And this process is what over time allows you to create space or distance around your problems so they don’t loom quite so large. And more importantly, your response to them becomes more appropriate, which in turn makes them smaller. We've all experienced how an overemotional response to a problem tends to make it worse. Luckily, the reverse is also true.
My personal example of the ‘space around your problems’ thing happened one evening early on when I arrived at Sangha absolutely furious over something at work. I was vastly pissed off and I didn’t expect to be able to sit still at all, let alone quiet my thoughts. Oddly enough, that was one of my best sittings. I suddenly had this incredible sensation of splitting into two awarenesses, one childish and furious and the other calm, loving and wise. The angry one was clearly me but I was able to recognize myself in the wise one as well, which felt kind of like me when I’m at my best as a mom. As this wise motherly presence I was able to watch my own tantrum with love and patience just as if I were one of my own kids and see how trivial the problem was in the grand scheme of things. It was kind of like when a friend describes some situation that is causing them pain and you are able to see clearly that it’s not that bad because you’re not the one caught up in it. There was space around the problem that allowed me to observe my reaction to it impartially.
This personality split is what is referred to as 'beginner's luck,' where you have a cool spiritual experience early on in your practice and then nothing for the next ten years. It has not happened since and I’m happy to report that although myriad things have annoyed me in the meantime, there hasn’t been anything else bad enough to trigger schizophrenia. But the experience created a lasting impression and a belief that we are more than our little concerns and subjective experiences and that we’d all be happier if we’d treat ourselves with the same love and tolerance we give our kids (on a good day, that is).
I admit that I am not very far along the Buddhist path and I certainly wouldn’t call myself a Buddhist. The interconnectedness of everything doesn’t impress me much as a reason to, say, love thy neighbor (that is, I believe that we’re all interconnected but I still think some people totally suck), and I also believe in good and evil, despite my Sangha leader’s best efforts to change my mind. But the practice of meditation offers some cool takeaways even for us spiritual Philistines.
For example, one of my go to practices while sitting is something that both Anthony Robbins and Eckhart Tolle recommend: I concentrate on the force of life in my hands. That probably sounds corny if you haven’t tried it but think about it: something flows through the universe on a such a microscopic level we can only theorize about it after years of graduate school, connecting everything, holding it all together somehow. This is now accepted in both the spiritual sphere (well, at least by the Buddhists) and the scientific sphere. And the amazing thing is that if you focus your undivided attention on your hands you can actually start to feel that something, or at least a darn good imitation. For some reason it’s stronger in the hands than other parts of the body and stronger still if you bring your hands near each other without touching. It’s not your soul, it’s certainly not your thoughts but it might just be the source of life itself. And the really cool thing is that if I pet my cat after doing this he gets a light static shock so he tends to stay away from me when I'm sitting.
I sometimes wonder what kind of world this would be if we taught our children to pay attention to the life within them instead of how to follow schedules, take tests and manipulate people to get what they want?
Anyway, believe me or don’t, but give it a try. Tingly hands are almost as cool as tingly brain and quite refreshing after hours of compensation design.
And my very favorite thing about sitting? You’ll never guess. It’s the laughter. Sometimes when I’m watching my own thoughts I hear the most fantastic, joyful laughter in my head. It kind of sounds like me but more so. It doesn’t happen often and it’s probably just my own imagined reaction to some silly egoic thoughts I’m having but whoever it is laughing in there sounds like someone I want to know better.
So at the end of the day I keep sitting, hoping it’s me.
December 1, 2008
Quote of the Day: I want a man, not a lobster!
The German equivalent of Netflicks is called ‘Lovefilm.de’, which suggests something a bit racier than it is. Lovefilm.de costs more than Netflicks and doesn’t have the same selection but it’s basically the same idea. Recently they sent us a movie we didn’t order: ‘Indiscreet,’ with Cary Grant and Ingrid Bergman. It was a bit slow, as older romantic comedies tend to be, but had lavish costumes, good dialog and superior acting. And it had this great line about men and lobsters. If you’re an old romantic comedy buff it’s a solid choice.
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