April 16, 2010

Bedouins, Camels and Viagra

As some of you know, Ralf and I just got back from a week in Egypt, specifically in Sharm el Sheikh, which is a small beach community near the Sinai national park that is inhabited largely by Bedouins.

Sadly, no one got my 'Bedouin Breakfast' pun about our hotel. I tell you, my wit feels wasted sometimes.

Our favorite pasttime during the week was to sit in what we referred to as the 'Hooka Shack', a quiet beachfront shisha bar where you can sip Bedouin tea (black tea with lots of sugar in a little pot) and smoke an enormous water bong while reading and watching the waves.

We also went diving, although I had to give it up after the first day due to ear problems. It's sad, really. I am a Padi certified advanced diver. I have done night dives, retrieval dives, navigation dives, wreck dives, shore dives, boat dives and deep dives. I can take all my gear off (mask, oxygen, the works) 20 meters under water, swim away from it, swim back and put it all back on without panicking (much) and dying a horrible oxygen deprived death.

I don't enjoy doing these things, you understand, but I can.

Nonetheless I have an ongoing battle with my ears and usually have to stop diving and go to the doctor before the end of each vacation. You may be wondering how I got certified in the first place, to which I can only respond, 'Sheer bloodymindedness.'

Still, I didn't mind skipping it this time. What with one thing and another, I was happy not to dress up in a rubber suit and lug around a heavy oxygen tank. I carefully divided my vacation time between lounging about, snorkling, sipping tea, staring at the horizon, reading and visiting my friend Barbara, who is lucky enough to call the desert her home.

And now two tableaus from our vacation involving Bedouins, camels and Viagra - I know you're gonna jump right to the Viagra one:

Tableau 1: The Father In Law
One of the dive instructors was a friendly Bedouin fellow named Nur, who's married to the boss's daughter. After Ralf's first dive on the second day (I was on the boat but not diving) Nur got a radio call from Umbi, the boss and his FIL, to bring our boat out to Umbi's yacht during the lunch break. Apparently, Umbi had dropped something in the water and wanted Nur to dive for it. Nur rolled his eyes and muttered, 'It's probably a coffee spoon,' then slouched off to get suited up again. When we reached the yacht, Umbi waved at us good-naturedly and Ralf asked him if he always makes his poor SIL do extra work for him. Umbi grinned and answered, 'Nur was supposed to pay me 5 camels for my daughter and I haven't seen a single camel yet. He owes me!'

Tableau 2: The Viagra
After I visited the doctor and was told I would be fine in a week but would have to take a break from diving, we stopped by the pharmacy to get some medicine to speed up the re-absorbtion of the blood that had pooled behind my traumatized eardrums. Uh... TMI? Anyway, we got the medicine (everything for about $2, it's SOOO cheap!) and the pharmacist looked at me, looked at Ralf, grinned suggestively and handed him a free packet of Viagra. Ralf, not to be outdone, grinned back even more suggestively and returned the packet. I didn't quite catch what the pharmacist said as we left but it sounded a bit like, 'Strong man!'

Pictures here and here.

19 comments:

  1. Ha ha about Ralf and the Viagra...

    I envy you your time away... sounds heavenly, even with trauma in the ears.

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  2. What a cool vacation! Sorry about those ears though.

    BTW, I've moved! I can now be found at: http://www.thedentalmaven.com/ Hope to see you there!

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  3. I'm certain I would have enjoyed your vacation much more than mine.

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  4. I had no idea you were a diver. You are so cool.

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  5. Oh, yeah, baby, if I could ever actually go in the water I'd be a navy seal.

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  6. Diving sure is a lot of work, isn't it?
    Amazing about the Viagra. No questions if he had blood pressure problems, etc? Although Ralf could have taken the Viagra and bartered with it!

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  7. True... we didn't really consider the commercial aspect.

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  8. Whoa! I'm panicking just thinking about removing my gear underwater.

    I also have some issues with my ears. I don't know if I'll ever get certified.

    I love to snorkel, though.

    It sounds like a great trip.

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  9. wow, now I totally want to see you dive! Great shots below and i am so jealous that you are not afraid of being eaten by a shark.

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  10. Glad you made it back before the volcano spew.

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  11. No complimentary Viagra necessary! You lucky girl.

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  12. The FIL story was the better one :)

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  13. I love the FIL story - hasn't gotten his payment of camels, eh? ;)

    And the viagra story? BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Hysterical! :)

    Sorry about your ears - that does not sound fun!

    But your vacation sure does! :)

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  14. Great stories! Sorry about your ears, though.

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  15. Damn SIL - wonder what the interest rate is on unpaid camels?

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  16. LOL Good on your Hubby! What a cheeky little Doctor!

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  17. That is just too funny about the viagra! What a cool vacation you had!

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  18. Thanks for sharing your experience.It was an interesting post to read.I have always longed to go to Egypt but till not it is yet to get materialized.You have amazing diving skills.The Viagra bit was really funny.Look forward to hearing from you soon again.

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  19. Oh come on! That is just too much for one post!
    I'm going to have to recover from the jealousy on this one. Scuba diving in Egypt? Not too shabby. I haven't been diving in so long. And only in Pennsylvania. Can you imagine?

    Ralf. Very nice. :)

    Bedouin Breakfast. ha!

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