September 10, 2009

F is for Fitness

You may recall that I recently joined a gym that I've been attending on a pay-per-visit basis for about 8 years. One of the reasons was that I wanted to break out of my unmotivating stairmaster rut and get back into aerobics.

Yes, people, 'back into.' I was an aerobics instructor in college, although my workout regime has been pretty spotty since then. Sadly, I no longer have a heart like a horse but on the upside, I'm carrying around 30 fewer pounds than I was back then, so all in all it hasn't been a huge transition back to fat burning activity.

As a rule I don't like female aerobics instructors, although of course I was my own favorite instructor back in the day. Particularly not in Germany. German women tend to be a bit gamier than their American counterparts, due to more lean muscle and less sun screen. I don't mean they aren't attractive, far from it. Many of the women at my gym are drop dead gorgeous in that tan, toned, golden blonde, sky blue eyed way that well-heeled Californian housewives try to emulate.
Maybe just a tad leathery, but not in a bad way.

Then there's me. Well, you know what I look like. On a normal day, almost pretty. Although I must say that after two weeks of relentless aerobics I am starting to look almost hot, which I think trumps almost pretty. And I plan to plateau at almost hot because hot would be way too much work.

But anyway, German female aerobics instructors often have strict personalities and I don't feel like being scolded by Frau Willhemina Wunderbar while I excercise. The exception is my yoga instructor, Caroline, who talks like Kathleen Turner and always asks me in a throaty, wondering tone why I can't fold myself in half. But that's not scolding, she's just saying.

My favorite aerobics instructor is Christopher, a skinny, flamboyant young man who clearly enjoys putting the hottest women in Munich - and me - through our paces.

Of course, the best part is eating cake afterwards.

PS For those of you kind enough to send me warm fuzzies over at Working Girl I have a new post in which several celebrities make a cameo:


  1. Can I cut the working out part and go straight to the cake?

  2. Gamier as in "unwholesome" or gamier as in "smells like uncooked and slightly tainted meat?"

  3. Yes, me too. F for fitness starting Monday. I have neglected it all summer long and I am starting to feel the pinch, even in my favourite and most forgiving pair of jeans.

  4. I always have to eat something bad for me after working out.

    And I totally picture German aerobics teachers as being manly.

  5. Anyone ever watch In Living Color on TV YEARS ago with Jim Carey as one of the actors/comedians? He played a fitness instructor--forget the female character's name. Helga? He had two little blond ponytails and a one inch band around his chest covering his nipples? I can't write anymore because I am laughing at the memory!

  6. You're thirty pounds lighter than in your youth? Ugh. I'm going to go eat cake now.

  7. LM: Well, maybe 25. And 10 of it was muscle.

  8. I haven't joined a gym but I did get a Wii Fit, does that count?

  9. Well... sort of:


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