March 26, 2009

The plot thickens...

If you haven't been following the story so far I recommend reading the previous two posts.

Plot summary: We have to pick a religious track for K's school next year. The hitch is that she gets to pick 2 friends to stay with and they have to be either Catholic or Athiest/other because the Protestants will be in a different class. We will probably sign her up for Ethics class rather than Catholic or Protestant studies but it's not so simple. . .

A final note: I've been using the word 'Athiest' but the better word choice would probably be 'Other' since that's the choice offered to anyone who is not Catholic or Protestant.

Now that that's cleared up, the plot thickens. If we were all just a little prettier and sluttier this could be an episode of Desperate Housewives. . .

I got TWO more calls yesterday.

The first was from Tina's mom. Remember Tina the Athiest? Well, it turns out not so much.

At first I thought she wanted to lock in the K, Celia and Tina trio for the Ethics track but no - she was calling to let me know that Tina really wants to be with Celia but not K. Little Tina prefers another little girl who is Protestant so Tina's mom is also considering Protestant studies.

It suddenly occurred to me: OMG, she's warning me off!!

I heard her out and refrained from mentioning that Celia's mom had called me and no mention had been made of the formerly athiest Tina.

Later Leia's mom called. You may recall Leia as the Protestant girl whose religious affiliation has been causing all the trouble (unless, or course, you take the viewpoint that we are causing it with our heathen ways).

I found Leia's mom extremely pleasant and felt sad that we might have to separate K from Leia. They aren't very religious, either, but after much discussion thought Protestant studies would be a rounding experience for Leia. The hitch is that Leia really, really wants to be with K and the feeling is mutual.

Anyway, Leia's mom was torn by the idea of ethics v. Protestant studies. Leia's dad was less torn - in the background I could hear him yelling, 'My God, just sign her up for ethics and be done with it!'

I still want K to do Ethics, mainly because I'll have to help her with homework and I don't think I'm up to explaining the Bible. The question is, can we persuade Leia's parents to join with us?

And is it ethical to do so?

Spiritual and social fates may hang in the balance. . .


  1. I recommend you look beyond the friendship issues and just sign her up for what you want her to study. My experience with little girls is that their friendships change with the weather -- especially at K's age. So if it's possible, I'd stop worrying about what all the other parents and girls want to do and follow your own convictions. The girls will learn regardless of who's in the class with them.

  2. Well, it's an easier decision for me. Since we are not atheist and also not Christian, we will sign our daughter up for Ethics without any thought at all of friendships. . I would sign K up for whatever you want her to learn. If you are Catholic or Protestant, sign her up for those, if not, for ethics and put her in a training outside of school such as Buddhist or Judaism (as we will). I like to think that my children will be able to make and have friend unrelated to their religion or religious schooling. Naive, perhaps, on my part.

  3. Why don't they offer a proper Heathen class? :)heehee
    Little girls *are* fickle. I'd have to agree with PattyP on that.
    And the phone calls! My goodness, the drama! I'd have to make a decision on a class simply to extricate myself from all that. Can't do the drama. I'm so bad at it.

  4. I somehow feel a strong desire to make an anti-ethics comment but can't quite get it to work out so instead I'm going to say "how dare you suggest that I'm not slutty enough for Desperate Housewives" [grin]

  5. Whoa... this is complicated stuff!! Let me know when you try to choose a college! :)

    I'm new, so I'll have to investigate to learn ages... but will they even pay attention to learn anything anyways? :)

  6. So if you're not catholic, nor protestant, you're therefore an atheist(meaning you BELIEVE there is NO god)? What happened to being an agnostic? Or at least "other"? Do they have muslim studies for the large immigrant populations?

    Sounds like it's officially called "Ethics class" in the school system. Conceptually at least, that option would appeal most to me, and that's what I'd go for (being a former catholic married to a former protestant, now we're "neither").
    The background friendship drama cracks me up -- are the girls separated only during that one hour (and that seems minor to me), or are they separated completely and placed in completely different classes/homerooms?

  7. Let Leia's mom make the decision without outside influence. Otherwise you'll be blamed if things go wrong.

  8. I'd say do the ethics class. Maybe K will make new friends with less drama-inclined moms...

  9. Waaaay too much grade school drama. I'd put her in ethics too. That's what I would have done with my kids had there been a choice. The girls can still be friends even if they're not in the same class.

    And just for a couple of readers who seem confused - the ethics class, which is called Werte und Norman (values and norms) where my kids go to school, is NOT just for atheists/agnostics, it's for children who don't belong to either the Protestant or Catholic faith. It has nothing to do with believing in (a)god(s) or not. I feel the kids get a more well-rounded education in that class because they discuss universal values and morals and learn about *all* the world religions instead of just focusing on one.

  10. Oh, for the love of Pete! How about a dart board with the three options on it?

  11. OMG - politics at this young age!???

    I say make your own decision and let the other parents make theirs. After all, they can always play with each other in the breaks or at the weekends and when school is out.

    I would never choose a subject because my daughter's friend was also doing it - after all, the friendship will last if it's rea.

  12. Er... I meant - ... if it's real.

  13. Honey Pie, do you have an email address? Couldn't find one on your blog. If you do, please buzz me at "" so I can send you an email.

  14. Is diversity a word that they know over there? Just wondering.


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